Wednesday, July 21, 2010
On Spontaneity and Denial
Spontaneous isn’t really spontaneous. Everything is linked, a chain of events that may seem sudden but is actually gradual and progressive, distorted only by our relative view of time. Coincidence is non-existent, it is only our denial of the way of the universe. Things happen for a multitude of reasons, reasons that we don’t always accept, and in so denying we fail to see the real masterpiece of life, the masterpiece that wonderfully blends the pastel and dark colors of existence.
Change and The World Behind
I have spent the past year thinking how tainted I have become, and how much more darkness I shall come to embrace in the future.
The concept of “killing for the sake of justice” gradually became acceptable when before I considered it the ultimate sin, the point of no return. I think to myself, ‘Is this part of growing up? Is innocence just a boon only for children?’
Two weeks ago, they called two Code Blues in the E.R of the hospital I was training in. As one patient’s wife howled for her husband to fight, to keep on living, I wanted to cry with her. I felt for her, but there’s this one nasty thought in the back of my mind. It said, ‘That’s not pain. There’s still hope. I want to see real pain.’
I don’t fear for my sanity, I am perfectly sane. What I fear for, is what my morals would come to as I age. When one by one “childish” dreams and ideals get crushed, where else could I turn?
What else would I deem acceptable in the coming days?
The concept of “killing for the sake of justice” gradually became acceptable when before I considered it the ultimate sin, the point of no return. I think to myself, ‘Is this part of growing up? Is innocence just a boon only for children?’
Two weeks ago, they called two Code Blues in the E.R of the hospital I was training in. As one patient’s wife howled for her husband to fight, to keep on living, I wanted to cry with her. I felt for her, but there’s this one nasty thought in the back of my mind. It said, ‘That’s not pain. There’s still hope. I want to see real pain.’
I don’t fear for my sanity, I am perfectly sane. What I fear for, is what my morals would come to as I age. When one by one “childish” dreams and ideals get crushed, where else could I turn?
What else would I deem acceptable in the coming days?
Change and The World Behind
I have spent the past year thinking how tainted I have become, and how much more darkness I shall come to embrace in the future.
The concept of “killing for the sake of justice” gradually became acceptable when before I considered it the ultimate sin, the point of no return. I think to myself, ‘Is this part of growing up? Is innocence just a boon only for children?’
Two weeks ago, they called two Code Blues in the E.R of the hospital I was training in. As one patient’s wife howled for her husband to fight, to keep on living, I wanted to cry with her. I felt for her, but there’s this one nasty thought in the back of my mind. It said, ‘That’s not pain. There’s still hope. I want to see real pain.’
I don’t fear for my sanity, I am perfectly sane. What I fear for, is what my morals would come to as I age. When one by one “childish” dreams and ideals get crushed, where else could I turn?
What else would I deem acceptable in the coming days?
The concept of “killing for the sake of justice” gradually became acceptable when before I considered it the ultimate sin, the point of no return. I think to myself, ‘Is this part of growing up? Is innocence just a boon only for children?’
Two weeks ago, they called two Code Blues in the E.R of the hospital I was training in. As one patient’s wife howled for her husband to fight, to keep on living, I wanted to cry with her. I felt for her, but there’s this one nasty thought in the back of my mind. It said, ‘That’s not pain. There’s still hope. I want to see real pain.’
I don’t fear for my sanity, I am perfectly sane. What I fear for, is what my morals would come to as I age. When one by one “childish” dreams and ideals get crushed, where else could I turn?
What else would I deem acceptable in the coming days?
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